Of Desire and Yearning

Aching, painful yearning is how we would describe the desire for things we cannot have or that we have to wait long periods of time to obtain. How, then, do we describe the feelings when we do obtain those "things"? Exhilaration? Utter joy? Does it last? No, because tomorrow the aching returns but for something else. It is a hunger that is never satisfied. A beast that devours only to devour again. I am reading A. W. Tozer's The Pursuit of God and am amazed that a book written in 1948 so aptly describes our current culture. Even in our Christian circles, yes even in our very service to God, we long for what will make us feel good and satisfy our need to share our talents with the world. I am not immune. Today as I read, I felt ashamed of my misplaced longing. Yes, our talents are gifts given to us to be given away, but they are not to be our first priorities. If God stripped us of everything we had, even our very talents to serve Him, would we still desire Him? If I physically had nothing at all, would I praise Him just the same? Does my soul long for God and only God? How do I become poor in spirit (Matthew 5:3)? When I think of someone who is poor, I immediately think of someone who is struggling for the basic necessities of life, someone who does not have money for the "fluff" of life, someone who is stripped of everything but what it takes to exist day to day. A poor person may have to make do with whatever he has. What does it mean to be poor in spirit? If we think of being rich in spirit, do we mean possessing great knowledge? Excessively talented? Privy to God's plan? If "spirit" is the part of our being that connects to God or the part of us that is stirred to act, decide, live, and love, then what does it mean for that part of us to be poor? I think to be poor in spirit is to be stripped of everything that makes me want to elevate myself so that there is room to be filled with only God. It means my motivation is to elevate Him in all that I do. And what is my reward? The Kingdom of Heaven, a relationship with God that transcends any other relationship I could ever hope to have so that my earthly relationships are God-built and blessed. "When the Lord divided Canaan among the tribes of Israel, Levi received no share of the land. God said to him simply, 'I am thy part and thine inheritance,' and by those words made him richer than all his brethren, richer than all the kings and rajas who have ever lived in the world. And there is a spiritual principal here, a principal still valid for every priest of the Most High God." - The Pursuit of God, A. W. Tozer. How wonderful to be able to say I have God, and I have need of nothing else! My prayer today is that God reveal to me the stuff of life that stands in the way of unity with Him. I want to know Him, to be filled with Him so much so that I exude His very essence. When I meet someone new, I don't want them to walk away and think about me but about Him. When I die, I want others to glorify Him and rejoice that my earthly shell has released me to bask completely in His presence. Oh, sweet Lord Jesus, I have a long way to go!